Denzel Washington & the Beauty of Aging

Like many other Black women, and non Black women—hell, and men too for that matter—I love Denzel Washington. Throughout my teenage and early adult years I had the biggest crush on him, affectionately nicknaming him, “Daddy Denzel.” Now that we are both older, however, it has transitioned from a crush on a handsome man to admiration of an amazing being. I think everyone can agree that there is something special about Denzel. He’s extremely easy on the eyes, a master of his craft, and a humble person who is very down to earth. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who didn’t like Denzel, and if I did I would seriously question their mental stability. Another thing I love about Denzel is that in a society that likes to tell us that Black men don’t like Black women—especially in the entertainment industry—he shows us that society definitely wasn’t talking about him. It’s refreshing to see Denzel with his Black family.

As someone who enjoys The Equalizer movies, with Equalizer 2 being my favorite, I knew I had to go see the third installment when it was released late last year. Like John Wick, The Equalizer is one of those movies that no matter how unrealistic a scene seems I’m going to rock with it for the sake of entertainment and in this case for the sake of Denzel. So needless to say, I really enjoyed Equalizer 3 and seeing Denzel and Dakota reunited was a cute touch—though I maintain, Equalizer 2 still holds the crown. Ironically, what I loved most about the movie had nothing to do with the movie at all. About halfway through watching, a realization hit me, and I said quietly to myself, “Oh my God, Denzel has gotten old.” It wasn’t said in a judgmental or negative way, either, I was honestly in awe of what I was seeing. Though he has been getting old for a while now, as we all have, it wasn’t until I watched Equalizer 3 that that fact really settled in with me. I realized that he was no longer young Mo Better Blues Denzel or even middle-aged Training Day Denzel, but almost 70 years old Equalizer 3 Denzel and in that moment, my feelings regarding aging changed. For the first time in my life I saw aging for what it was—a blessing and a beautiful sight to see.

I didn’t start focusing on my age until I turned twenty-seven. Twenty-seven meant thirty was right around the corner and thirty to me meant life was pretty much over. Dramatic I know, but what can I say, aging terrified me. I know I am not the only person who feels or has felt this way at some point in their life, society’s obsession with youth doesn’t make it any easier either. Every other article I see is about how to stay young, how to look young, how to feel young—women (and men) spend thousands of dollars on surgeries, facial creams and tools all in an attempt to look younger—no wonder why so many of us struggle with getting older.

I turned thirty-two in May and I credit Denzel for me being able to happily embrace another year rather than be deeply depressed about it. The reason why my views on aging changed is because seeing Denzel age put things into perspective for me. I realized what made Denzel aging so special was the fact that he was alive and had the privilege of getting older, especially in a world that usually robs us of the experience of seeing Black men we love getting old. As I write this, I’m thinking of two of my favorites who were not only ahead of their time but also taken from us way before their time. Tupac died at age 25 and Nipsey at 33, and sadly we will never get to see them with wrinkles forming in the corners of their eyes, or gray hair covering their heads and faces. We will never get to watch them age gracefully, which is what makes me appreciate witnessing Denzel age even more.

Yes, being young is a beautiful thing and has its advantages but the same is true for growing older. There is a certain wisdom that only comes with age and I pray I live long enough to not only gain that wisdom but to also be able to share it with the youngins who come after me.

I hope we all begin to see aging for the blessing that it is. I hope we never forget to appreciate this life we have been given because not even the next minute is promised. And I hope we get many more years of watching Denzel kill it on the screen while growing older and judging by this picture that was recently released for his upcoming role in the new Gladiator movie it doesn’t look like he has any plans of slowing down any time soon. I love that for him, I love that for us.